Pull Together Instead of Apart
Can two people walk together without agreeing on the direction? Amos 3:3 (New Living Translation, NLT)
Most important of all, continue to show deep love for each other, for love covers a multitude of sins. I Peter 4:8 (New Living Translation, NLT)
There come times in every marriage where things get rough and it can be tempting to give up. The opportunities to become offended abound. Irritations and frustrations build up and threaten to overflow. It may even be tempting to throw in the towel and walk away from it all. The pressure is real, but we can overcome it.
First of all, understand that you cannot give what you do not have. If you are not full of the love of the Lord, you cannot release it to others. When your spouse says or does something that is hurtful or offensive, the love of God should enable you to overlook it and cover it with love. If you find yourself lashing out during a disagreement and adding fuel to the fire, take a step back and examine your relationship with the Lord. Love overlooks a lot of offenses, and I John 4:8 tells us God is love. Therefore, if we are not operating in love, we are not operating in the love of God. In that case, overlooking insults and offenses will not be easy. If you are short-tempered, take time and get alone with God. Let Him fill your love tank so you can dispense it to others.
A friend loves at all times, And a brother is born for adversity. Proverbs 17:17 (NKJV)
Love isn’t just to be given to those who are good to us. Love is the most powerful when it is shared with those who do not “deserve” it. Love is an all-day, everyday thing.
Additionally, we must be aware that there are times when the enemy, satan, will do his best to sow discord and offense into marriages. He knows that a solid, Christ-centered marriage is one of the most powerful oppositions to the kingdom of darkness. One thing he does is to pile on outside factors. He will add pressures outside the marriage relationship, maybe from work or finances or children, to put additional strain on one or both spouses. His goal is to divide and conquer. In such times, the temptation is to turn against the very person that God has placed in our lives to help us resist the enemy- our husband or wife. Because spouses are around each another so much, it can be easy to take out irritations and frustrations on them. Be conscious of this, and instead of attacking your mate, attack the real enemy, the devil. Use the Word of God and the Name of Jesus to cast him our of your presence and decree his defeat. Use the authority God has given you to protect your marriage. Purposely speak words of unity and edification into your marriage- even if you don’t feel like it. After you do it for a little while, your feelings will fall in line.
It is true that often the tendency is to pull away from our husband or wife, giving in to anger and pride in stressful situations. Don’t pull against one another. Your spouse is not your real enemy, so pull together instead of apart.
